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Children Age 0-1 Years
Children Age 1-5 Years
Children Age 6-12 Years
Children Age 13-17 Years
Adult Children
Children with Special Needs
Children Age 1-5 Years
Children Age 6-12 Years
Children Age 13-17 Years
Adult Children
Children with Special Needs
Child Development
Resources
Child raising portals specifically for
children in these age groups
Resources
Child raising portals specifically for
children in these age groups
These are topics that people ask about all of
the time, there are discussion forums and
community groups with each
the time, there are discussion forums and
community groups with each
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Have a parenting problem??
Talk about it in Sara's Circle,
the Child Care Community
Discussion Group, to get help
from other Parents!
Have a parenting problem??
Talk about it in Sara's Circle,
the Child Care Community
Discussion Group, to get help
from other Parents!
Sara's Cheat Sheets are parenting check lists and
guides to doing a good and thorough job in those
challenging first time tasks that parents come
across. If you have suggestions or additions
please write to sara@parentingwithsara.com
guides to doing a good and thorough job in those
challenging first time tasks that parents come
across. If you have suggestions or additions
please write to sara@parentingwithsara.com
Welcome to ParentingwithSara.com
featuring Parenting Advice, Child
Care and Child Raising Advice. Sara
not only has children and grand
children, but also has a degree in
Psychology, a masters degree in
Family Counseling and was a family
specialist in Lousville, Ky for more
than 10 years.
featuring Parenting Advice, Child
Care and Child Raising Advice. Sara
not only has children and grand
children, but also has a degree in
Psychology, a masters degree in
Family Counseling and was a family
specialist in Lousville, Ky for more
than 10 years.
Dear Sara answers parenting and child raising
questions from readers, new columns are
posted on Mondays and Thursdays, this column
was published November 30, 2009
Dear Sara,
My style of parenting is totally
different from my husband’s. He is
easy going and doesn’t care if the
kids do what they want. I want
some order and structure and insist
that our kids follow the rules. They
are now old enough to go to him if
they don’t like the rules and he will
tell them everything is O.K. and they
can do what they want. I am now
the bad guy and my husband is the
good guy. I am angry and
frustrated. How can I get him to
stop doing this?
Nicole
Dear Nicole,
You and your husband need to have a
discussion someplace where your kids
can’t hear you and are not involved.
Maybe he feels that you are too strict
with the kids and wants to defend
them. Since you are angry and
frustrated, try to stay calm. Write
down the rules and see if you can
come to some compromise.
It’s really important that the two of
you be on the same page. The
conflict can impact your children’s
ability to feel safe when they can’t
trust their parent’s judgment. This”
taking sides” with the children not
only undermines your authority but
sets the kids up to play you and your
husband against each other.
You have to look at yourself
objectively and decide if you are too
strict. If your husband is laid back
and came from a family that had fewer
rules, he may see you as too
controlling. The reason that you see
him as too lenient may be that your
family had strict rules that you had to
follow and this is comfortable for you.
When my kids got to be teens, my
husband made a rule that the girls
couldn’t date until they were 16. I
thought this was too strict because
my parents let me date at 14 (he
dated me when I was 14). I backed
him up though because I thought that
it was important for parents to
support each other.
If you decide that your husband is
being passive-aggressive or trying to
win favor with the children at your
expense, then be sure to seek some
marriage counseling. This isn’t
healthy for your children.
Sara
questions from readers, new columns are
posted on Mondays and Thursdays, this column
was published November 30, 2009
Dear Sara,
My style of parenting is totally
different from my husband’s. He is
easy going and doesn’t care if the
kids do what they want. I want
some order and structure and insist
that our kids follow the rules. They
are now old enough to go to him if
they don’t like the rules and he will
tell them everything is O.K. and they
can do what they want. I am now
the bad guy and my husband is the
good guy. I am angry and
frustrated. How can I get him to
stop doing this?
Nicole
Dear Nicole,
You and your husband need to have a
discussion someplace where your kids
can’t hear you and are not involved.
Maybe he feels that you are too strict
with the kids and wants to defend
them. Since you are angry and
frustrated, try to stay calm. Write
down the rules and see if you can
come to some compromise.
It’s really important that the two of
you be on the same page. The
conflict can impact your children’s
ability to feel safe when they can’t
trust their parent’s judgment. This”
taking sides” with the children not
only undermines your authority but
sets the kids up to play you and your
husband against each other.
You have to look at yourself
objectively and decide if you are too
strict. If your husband is laid back
and came from a family that had fewer
rules, he may see you as too
controlling. The reason that you see
him as too lenient may be that your
family had strict rules that you had to
follow and this is comfortable for you.
When my kids got to be teens, my
husband made a rule that the girls
couldn’t date until they were 16. I
thought this was too strict because
my parents let me date at 14 (he
dated me when I was 14). I backed
him up though because I thought that
it was important for parents to
support each other.
If you decide that your husband is
being passive-aggressive or trying to
win favor with the children at your
expense, then be sure to seek some
marriage counseling. This isn’t
healthy for your children.
Sara