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Welcome to ParentingwithSara.com
featuring Parenting Advice, Child
Care and Child Raising Advice.  Sara
not only has children and grand
children, but also has a degree in
Psychology, a masters degree in
Family Counseling and was a family
specialist in Lousville, Ky for more
than 10 years.
Dear Sara answers parenting and child raising
questions from readers, new columns are
posted on Mondays and Thursdays, this column
was published September 14, 2009



Dear Sara,
My 8 year old son can’t find friends
to play with at recess.  He says
everyone already has someone to
play with. What can I do to help?
Denise

Dear Denise,                         
I can certainly sympathize with your
son. When I was in first to third
grade, I had the same problem.  I felt
like I was on the outside looking in
and had no clue how to join the
group.  

As I look back, I wonder if they were a
neighborhood group who knew each
other outside of school.  When I was
going into fourth grade my family
moved and I attended a new school.  
I had no trouble making friends at the
new school.  I felt like I was
accepted.  I don’t think the problem
was with me but there didn’t seem to
be any way of breaking into the clique
at the old school.

One way for you to help your son
would be to volunteer at school and
get to know the Moms of the kids in
your son’s class.  This way you could
invite his school mates on an outing
to the movies or over to play on a
Saturday.  

Another way for your son to make
friends in his age group is for him to
join Boy Scouts or Little League. All of
the kids are included in the activities
so he would have the opportunity to
participate side by side and not feel
left out.

Making friends and being social is a
skill that some kids seem to have by
nature and other kids are more shy or
unable to approach others.  The
easiest way to approach this might be
in group activities where everyone is
doing things together in a team spirit.

I hope your son gets included  soon
because I know how unhappy he
must be.
Sara